Too many to remember?
Too many to admit?
More than once?
This was happening to me on a 6-8 week cycle.
The stress and tension would build, day by day. I’d bury it. Get on with my work. Meet my deadlines. And then around 6 to 8 weeks, the tension would climax, generally triggered by someone or something, and my internal rubber band would snap, and the floodgates would open. I’d deal with the aftermath of that for a few days. And then the same cycle would start again. Over and over. Time and time again.
I knew I couldn’t carry on with this cycle. I needed to break this pattern. I started looking for solutions.
I made the mistake of thinking that it wasn’t my fault. It had to be someone else’s fault. They had caused this to happen to me. Does that sound familiar?
But I was WRONG!
I realised that it was ALL ABOUT ME! No way. That meant it was my problem to solve. I had a CHOICE about whether I wanted it to carry on like this or if I wanted to do something about it.
So here’s what I did.
- I took ownership of the problem.
- I started a daily mindfulness practice.
- I learned about different communication styles.
- I started looking at things from different perspectives.
- I paused to reflect when my buttons were pressed.
- I gained the confidence to ask myself questions and think about what I could do differently.
- I owned it when I could have behaved better.
- I developed the courage to start a conversation with someone that triggered me.
- I owned my actions and reactions.
And now, here I am. Starting a new venture where I help others through the same challenges. This is my purpose and how I can help others break through their challenges.
No one should have to hide in a toilet or turn their camera off.